Self Discovery page 1

For 9 days now I am on a journey of self discovery and to that it means that there are times that I need to conquer some of my fears and step out of my comfort zone so here it is my first step as small as it is

A self photo of me with no make up I took a zillion of these as it seemed and this one seemed the nicest to post. though I am only an amature at photography as I go along with my journey I hope that I become better at it especially taking photos of myself.

I call this a raw photo of me yes it was taken in my bathroom where my art is of bathing beauties and you can see a bit of one of the photos ( after all the human body is a wonderful work of art ). as I began my journey for the past nine days I have been taking some stock of myself and that is where this photo kind of comes in. Last November I turned 48 years of age( by some young peoples standards I am considered getting old) however I don't look at it as older I look at it as I am gracefully getting wiser each year I celebrate the day I came into this world and took my first breath!. When I see myself there are times I see an aging woman, and as human as I am there are times when I do not want to see my self but since I started this journey I see my story that has been and is being written by my laugh/frown lines, by my eyes, and the lines around them, the dimples I was born with , scars from my youth, my double chin etc. I embrace it because as mentioned this is who I am, I have never been into the hype of plastic surgery don't get me wrong I am not putting those kind of procedures down for the many woman and men who can afford it and do it to make themselves feel better then I say good for them. but it is not for me. for me I am embracing from the Raw to the fullest of what makes me, and what better person to author their own story right? 

funny when I was taking photos of myself I kept hearing the Michael Jackson song play over and over in my head " Man in the Mirror" especially the line " I'm starting with the man in the mirror" then the line " and no message could have been any clearer if you want to make the world a better place take a look at yourself and then make a change" 

well perhaps my journey of self discovery will not make the world a better place but I am hoping for some healthy interior self change.

5 more quotes

so in 2011 I am going to be expressing quotes that I like or find interesting these quotes come from all over as I keep my mind open to all things.

here are the next five I am sharing.

" We experience ourselves, our thoughts and feelings as something separate from the rest. A kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us. restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for few persons nearest to us" Albert Einstein

" Our life is shaped by our mind, we become what we think Joy follows a pure thought like a shadow that never leaves" Buddha

" Zen does not confuse spirituality with thinking about God while one is peeling potatoes. Zen spirituality is just to peel the potatoes" Alan Watts

" The sublime vision comes to the pure and simple soul in a clean and chaste body" Ralph Waldo Emerson.

" At the center of your being you have the answer, you know who you are and you know what you want" Lao-tzu

Something to think about

This morning I awoke and found this in my email in box after reading it, it gave me food for thought so to speak it really as ignited a little inspiration of fuel in me as I am taking baby steps on my self discovery path any way just thought I would share this with you.

This quote is by Zen Teacher Cheryl Huber.

" Our lives are the result of what we Practice " I should be different", or " I'm afraid " or " I don't know what to do" that is the life experience we will have, what we get in life the life we have is the result of what we do, If i want to be joyful or peaceful or satisfied I must do joyful, peaceful or satisfied I cannot want one thing and practice another thing and get the result I want, what I practice is what I have it is imperative that what I practice is what I Want".


what is it that you want and practice?

On My Path of Self Discovery

In this new year I am embarking on a path of self discovery, I know that I am a soul-mate, wife, best friend, etc to my husband of 27 years and I continue to embrace what we have built and continue to build. he is my true north always has been and will continue to be even when we are put to the test.

I am a mother to my grown college age kids and would not trade that position for anything in the world my love for my kids and my husband our little family sustains me more than anything they are my guiding light in so many ways.

I am a sister to my sisters and brother and an auntie/Tia to my nieces and nephews. a friend to those who consider me a friend( which is a rare few) but I am a loyal friend. All these things that I know that make up me are fact, yet there are times when I feel like there is a puzzle piece of me missing nothing will change what I am as far as my family is concerned they are my first priority always but in this new year I feel the utmost need or calling if you will to rediscover me.

My first step is to take stock of my life thus far my 20's, 30's and present my 40's I am going to journal about each decade and write my feelings about it what I learned in those years and what I still long to learn, and perhaps along the way journal about it on a blog. what I know for sure is that this path I am embarking on I am guided by the good Lord above and I believe this self discovery is something the Lord is leading me to do and. I am in need of finding a self worth of balance and self healing and growing in my physical and mental and professional life( those are my buzzwords this year self and healing) and to let go of some of the non important baggage that I have been carrying with me. So with some journaling of my thoughts and some meditation I hope to be on the right path of my self discovery no matter how long it takes, or where it leads ( I am hoping to attend some workshops etc.) and even if I discover that there is no puzzle piece of me missing then I know I have had the greatest adventure in following my path of self discovery.

I love quotes and this quote in particular is one of my all time favorite spectacular quotes that hits home with me every time and will remain on my blog.

this quote is by Dolly Parton and reads

"FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE AND DO IT ON PURPOSE'

what path are you on this new year?

quotes to start the new year

I have used some of these quotes before in a blog or two but I think they are worth repeating for the first three days of the new year.

(A) "Nature does not hurry yet everything is accomplished" Lao -tzu

( B)" Now today moment by moment realize that each person and event that happens is life for you. Life is not somewhere else. See how fully you can accept the life that presents itself to you now" Brenda Shoshanna.

(C) " I do not cut my life up into days but my days into lives each day each hour an entire life" Juan Ramon Jimenez.

2010 In Review

Looking back at 2010

January- just enjoyed the month of a new year/daughter started new high school in middle of her senior year!
February - Valentines day and once a month hang outs with my son and daughter and date night with my husband
March- had some good and bad moments for the bad we are getting through it all and it made us stronger for the good we had some wonderful celebrations
April-son turned 20, hubby and I took a wonderful day trip to Monterey, celebrated Easter,
May- Daughter graduated high school, and a new boyfriend, husband and I celebrated 27 years of Marriage, daughter's boyfriend got very ill hospital but all is well.
June-celebrated husband and daughters birthdays 51 and 18, took a little weekend trip here and there
July- family vacation to Los Angeles, and San Diego and Arizona had a wonderful time visiting husbands Granny and parents while on a month's vacation from work and loved it!
August-went back to work, kids back at college, husband still off on workman's comp issue
Sept- daughter's boyfriend moved in with us and we did some work around the house
Oct- visited son at school, lost our beloved Granny, took a road trip to Oklahoma to pay our respects to Granny, also went to Branson Mo and saw Roy Clark something Granny would have enjoyed tremendously.celebrated daughter's boyfriend 21 st birthday.
Nov- celebrated Thanksgiving twice once with son at a pizza parlor as he could not come home for Thanksgiving, and the traditional Thanksgiving at home. embracing & celebrated my 48th birthday.furthering a great friendship with a fellow blogger who inspires me daily.
Dec- Traditional shopping bus trip to SF, holiday gatherings, son home for the holiday, Christmas shopping, baking and great family times. looking at my self and realizing I am on a road/journey of self discovery and taking small steps at it but will continue on this path. preparing to ring in the new year and knowing that whatever it may bring I will embrace it.

all in all I can honestly say that 2010 taught me many things. but I must say I am looking forward to the new year.

In the City

The first weekend in Dec we take a trip to the city of San Francisco

I like the cable cars and thought they were really cool all decorated for the Holiday Season.

it just gets me in the holiday spirit
This week I am preparing for my little family's new years celebration and getting ready to also take my son back to college on Sunday, but later this month I am hoping to spend a weekend in the city of San Fran and take a seminar that I have been so thrilled about. I don't think I am one who would enjoy the city life but I do love coming to San Francisco and visiting and since I live about two hours away it is nice to know I can go when I want.