moment

Funny how in a moment your life experiences many changes, when I was 16 years old I lost my father he passed away from a heart attack at the good old age of 82, granted he was up in his age and so it would be natural for this to occur but at 16 you don't really understand that. from that moment my life would change. I was not close to my father because of his age I imagine, but looking back at photos and the memories I can recall I appreciate what time I did have with him. in the moment of his death I found myself on a searching path, searching for what I did not know, I managed to keep my feelings inside and just muddle through life, then years later I found myself in that moment again when I was married( another blog!) and I had to travel back to Ca from Hawaii ( my husband was in military at time) for the death of my Mother and of course that brought up those old wounded moment memories of my Father's passing, difference is a Mother is the core of the whole family unit and to lose that shakes you. I have to say since my parents have been gone my family as different as we are have managed to still be a family, though we go on with our lives we manage to be there for each other when the moment arises.
through the years I had to experience those old moments again when I lost my two older brothers. I accept death is apart of life, and now I can say sometimes I still search for whatever
I am looking for I guess I will know when I have arrived and that to me will be one of many great moments.