Decisions

My daughter is a senior in high school and is now in the midst of having to make some important decisions of what colleges to apply to, as well as some other decisions. she is feeling the nervousness and I feel it too. My baby girl has grown so fast! and though I know it is time to let her spread her wings and fly I can't help but feel a little bit sad. I felt this way with my son but for some reason the feeling with my girl is hitting me a bit harder is it because she is my only daughter? or the last to leave the nest? I don't really know but what ever decision she makes for herself I will support in every way possible. she has always beat to a different drum and this I am sure will be no different. over the summer she and her brother got closer in many ways they have always been each others rock and this summer she really needed him and us. I am hoping that her choice will be somewhere not to far sort of like my son but she has already told me that though we love going to visit her brother in Santa Cruz she has no plans to apply to that college. I respect that! they need there own places to be. but I am hoping that she chooses some place that is in driving distance I guess we will know this spring.
Until then.

I May

I'm not a perfect girl my hair doesn't always stay in place and I spill things alot. I'm pretty clumsy and sometimes I have a broken heart.

and sometimes my friends and I fight
and some days nothing goes right.

but when I think about it and take a step back I remember how amazing life truly is and that maybe just maybe I like being imperfect

I Know

I know that God is LOVE and there's no fear in LOVE so I am FEARLESS

Quote for today

" If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change"

That Time Again

Well the time as come once again for my son to head back to UC Santa Cruz
he was home for the summer and aside from working and taking a trip to the Shakespeare festival with one of my sisters for a week in Oregon and being home. I feel as though the time flew by and I really did not get to spend the quality time I would have liked to with him. This last week we made it a point to hit the local Starbucks and sit with our drinks
him his white choc mocha me my venti black sweetened ice tea and a few scones and talk, this is a ritual we usually do but lately it has been a now and then thing. but it was good we talked. He did so well last year that this year will be even better for him. He found out two weeks ago that he is going to be a Residential Aide for 15 freshman! pretty ironic since he himself was a freshman last year so he can share the wisdom! what is more exciting is he gets is own dorm room!! and his food paid for the year which is really a blessing to us all. and with my hubby's VA paying the tuition he is pretty set for this school year
he is also going to be tutoring. so that will be is spending money!! of course he will be back for visits and we will be up there for plenty of visits and having him take us to the coolest eateries. He and I have our phone conversation nights which last year have become so very special to me. sometimes a mom just needs to hear her son's voice!!

Last week we did the last minute shopping of essentials you know laundry detergent, toiletries etc. I can honestly say I as I write this I am a bit teary eyed because I am savoring the moments, minutes, hours that we spent doing this.

I am so in awe of my baby yes, he is a young man but as any mother would say no matter what age he is always my first born baby forever. I know he will succeed with all the passion he has
he is a double major and last year got well on his way Anthropology and Legal studies he plans to go to grad school and can see himself teach at a university. and to be honest I can see him doing that.

so, though he left yesterday and his all settled in his new dorm room and we have already talked and I still feel a little blue it was so nice having him home. but I am looking forward to visiting him and having him show me all the great things in his world in Santa Cruz.